No. 4, In Bitter Sharp
GloSymCoWee Has Started!
Total Collective Note Count for 2012: 239,264,288
The Foundation for Frivolous Endeavors is pleased to herald the kickoff of Global Symphony Composing Week! GloSymCoWee is a fun, seat-of-your-pants approach to symphony composition! Participants begin composing on the first Friday of November. The goal is to write an extended musical composition of four movements (or 48 minutes) by 11:59:59 on the following Thursday night.
Valuing sheer volume of sequenced sound over musty old ‘craft,’ GloSymCoWee is a symphony composition program for everyone who has ever thought fleetingly about composing an entire symphony but has been scared away by the years of theory, practice, and thought involved in the endeavor.
Let’s face it: anyone can write a symphony, as long as they keep putting notes on staff paper. It’s not rocket science! Remember that Mormon woman whose derivative erotic etudes, based on Liberace, were adapted for the London Philharmonic Orchestra? She’s a millionaire, now!
Our ultimate goal at GloSymCoWee is to devalue—no, democratize—formal musical composition to the point of shabby volunteerism, so that sad interns are playing behind Amanda Palmer for free. Make all of your friends sit through your meandering sonata, because you listened to some Sibelius once, and that pretty much qualifies you.
If all goes to plan, graduates of music academies will feel that their training was totally in vain, a quaint but common skill, fodder for the ‘hobbies’ section of their resume.
Because: the Internet and shit!